Relationship Guarantee: Was This All You Needed to Keep Your Ex?
Security generates confidence, comfort, trust and certainty, regardless of the category to which it is related. So how much foundation can be built through a relationship based on this concept? I would think endless. When you reflect on your current or past relationships, is the security of the relationship something that is a predominant factor in whether you left or stayed?
The mechanics of a relationship
Generally speaking, relationships are acquired and maintained based on the same set of mechanics. At first there is an initial attraction, then an intrigue followed by some kind of chemistry. The attraction can be material, physical or cerebral. This sparks their intrigue which then leads to communication. So communication triggers the pheromones and creates that mutual interest and chemistry that takes us from acquaintances to partners. Then of course the sex finally follows! We all have inhibitors that tell us what we like and what we don’t like. These influence us to look for people who can fit a pre-established criteria for our tastes. Sometimes it is superficial things like gifts and social perceptions that attract us. Other times it’s more responsible things like ambition, intellectual conversation, and dependability. Either way, we sign up to have these things we like in our lives for an extended period of time. And don’t forget about the need to reciprocate those tastes to balance the relationship.
Where does feeling safe fit in?
Apart from love, there is no more comforting feeling that we can have than that of security and protection. Many of you won’t admit it, but much of your happiness begins once you’re somewhere or with someone who makes you feel safe. For example, let’s say you went to a party at someone’s house you didn’t know without a familiar face in sight. Would you feel safe and secure? Probably not (unless you’re Chuck Norris!). While you’re in that mindset that you’re not safe or protected, are you happy? Probably not! Safety does not come only from fear of bodily harm. You also cannot feel secure emotionally, financially, or intellectually. The lack of any of these feels like a huge commitment, especially in a relationship. Therefore, it goes without saying that security or collateral is an indispensable element of any flourishing relationship. Security in the relationship can sometimes be the determining factor of whether you are alone or involved.
relationship safety factors
There are several factors that contribute to a secure relationship. I will only touch on the most prominent ones, which are physical security, emotional security, and financial security. Physical security is one that is geared more toward women in a relationship. Every woman wants to feel that any partner with her can protect her from harm. This factor alone instills an element of comfort in dealing with anyone, even in the most basic of relationships. Next is emotional security. We all have vulnerabilities that we are willing to share with someone we know will embrace them and make a concerted effort not to exploit them. This is useless a healthy relationship. The last is financial security. This is one that has ruined many relationships. Financial security solidifies a partner’s confidence that virtually anything that comes up in the future can be addressed and resolved. What we sometimes forget about this factor is that both parties are equally responsible for cultivating this element of security. Most people can be taught some way to generate an income that supports multiple people. Sometimes we just have to make our partner financially secure.
With the help of natural relationship mechanics and the salient factors of relationship safety, most relationships should be able to stand the test of time. Too often we make the mistake of communicating to our partners that we feel that certain aspects of the relationship are missing. But if you have past, present, or future dealings with someone who really cares about you and wants the relationship to last, learning how to implement these keys to a successful relationship won’t be a problem.